The Long Way of Love
The past few weeks (or is it months? I don't know how long this 感触 took to surface) have seen me journeying with myself, the significant people in my life, and their significant other indirectly through the adventure of loving. Sometimes, I felt so tired of myself and the process- “真的很麻烦” And that was a very relatable sentiment my friend expressed yesterday. Perhaps it is easier to be alone. It is tiring to feel like I need to change/ accommodate for the other human bean, and to feel sucky that I feel that its tiring, and to feel like I just want to be who I am naturally. The need to check my assumptions and words, to seek to love in a way that honors & accepts the person, even if I don't agree with some things they do or when it triggers an emotional reaction. Or even to think about how to frame my words when I feel really down, hurt or disappointed about stuff. Sometimes, I feel like I don't want to do it anymore, disconnecting feels easier. At the same time, the