It's been a filled week- and now winding down, preparing for Sunday, I am in a contemplative mood. Against the strains of Coldplay I pause and have no words to describe my experience.

Ah wait I have- existential psychology.

My Mitwelt and Eigenwelt- interrelationships and my relationship with myself- seems to be coming together in a more congruent way.

I realised something in myself which affects how I relate to people and vice versa, but the links are not clear yet:

A memory often revisited and pondered over:
I was wearing a thick jumper (probably ugly), holding my Mum's hand as we walked to kindergarten where I would be brought to Snow City later on. I can hear. A child can hear "Why is she wearing such thick clothes in such a hot weather?"

I don't know why this memory is associated with shame for me. I know that I feel shame for myself and my parents.

Coming to awareness of this and acknowledging this shame has really helped me to be more authentic- and really, helped me to be more connected with people. For example, I will ask myself: "What is so shameful about asking your friends out?"

Thankful for this new environment that challenges me to confront myself. Can't really write more now; distracted by Skype conversation on the other bed (trying so hard not to follow it hahah).